Helping Your Anxious Child

Did you know that kids can struggle with anxiety? It is not just an adult problem.  Many children have or will experience anxiety in their lifetime.  Parents are often at a loss for what to do when their child is struggling with 

anxiety.  Sometimes we have a hard time noticing a child is anxious.  Anxiety problems can often be silent or may look like behavior problems.  Here are some signs that your child might be struggling with anxiety. 

• They may get agitated easily
• May feel restless
• Difficulty paying attention
• Frequent tummy aches or headaches 
• Tantrums
• They may avoid something or someone
• Meltdowns over homework
• Have a hard time going to sleep
• Clinginess

Do understand that some of these issues and behaviors can be a normal part of development, however, if you have concerns about your child's behavior, you may want to consult with your child's doctor or therapist.  Children often do not have the words to tell a parent or caregiver what they are feeling.  There are some things parents and caregivers can do to help a child with these issues.

• Try to remain calm.  Take a deep breath.  Do the best you can to maintain your composure to help your child regain control.
• Give your child the words to say.  When a child can not describe with words how they are feeling, we can help them find the right words.  Ask questions if they are able to tolerate it.  Help them find a way to describe what is going on.
• Let them use a calm down strategy.  In the middle of a meltdown is not the best time to teach or process what happened.  If you think you have an anxious child, plan ahead by finding something that will help them calm down.  This might be a stuffed animal or favorite toy, perhaps a quiet, calming place in the home or classroom, you may also make something ahead of time, such as a calm down jar.  Meditation and breathing exercises are also good ways to help a child learn to self-soothe.
• Talk about it when calm.  Help your child explain what happened.  Use a soothing voice.  Do not be accusatory or judgmental.  Ask questions such as "What happened next?" and "How can I help you?".  Be supportive of your child and their feelings.  Here is an excellent resource for things you might say to help your child through anxiety.  
• Remember to take care of yourself and process the events on your own.  It is hard knowing your child is struggling.  Remember to process what happened and work through your own feelings.

If you think your child is struggling with anxiety, consider talking with a therapist or a doctor for more information.  A skilled practitioner can help you and your child worked through anxiety and provide additional resources to help.



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